Ethics & ReligionA Column by Michael J. McManus |
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September 18, 2004 Mutual Consent Divorce Reform Last weekend every American thought deeply about the 3,000 Americans who lost their lives on 9/11/01. The terrorism destroyed 3,000 families. Yet since that date, there have been 3 million divorces that shattered the lives of 3 million children. That calamity was 1,000 times worse yet no one thinks about it, except family members in 3 million demolished civilizations. The rest of us must care, and take steps to spare future families. The impact is greatest on the innocent, the children. Children of divorce are twice as likely to drop out of school as those from intact homes, three times as apt to have a baby out of wedlock, five-fold more likely to be in poverty and 12 times more apt to be incarcerated. "Contrary to what we have long thought, the major impact of divorce does not occur during childhood or adolescence. Rather, it rises in adulthood as serious romantic relationships move center stage. When it comes time to choose a life mate and build a new family, the effects of divorce crescendo," wrote Judith Wallerstein after following 100 children of divorce for 25 years after parental divorce, in her landmark book, "The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce." Only 60 of the100, now aged 27-43, had ever married vs. 84 percent of those from intact families. And 25 of the 60 had already divorced, leaving only a third who built lasting marriages. What is achingly needed is to reform No-Fault Divorce. It could save hundreds of thousands of marriages now terminated too hastily. Ironically, No-Fault was once seen as a reform. "In New York and New England for most of the 20th Century, adultery was the only grounds for divorce. People who wanted divorce did negotiate the terms of their divorce and agree by mutual consent. But they'd have to fake pictures of adultery and lie in court," says John Crouch of Americans for Divorce Reform. No-Fault removed lies by allowing a spouse to exit unilaterally without proving the other guilty of a major fault, such as adultery, abandonment or abuse. The result? 1. A 1998 study reports No-Fault Laws caused a 17 percent increase in divorce rates. 2. Divorced women and their
children suffered economically. Prior to No-Fault, wives were awarded
60 percent or more of the property. If a man wanted a divorce, he's have to
bargain with his wife, making economic concessions to obtain her consent. Assets are
now divided equally, and since women often dropped out of the work force to
raise children, they are less able to support themselves. |
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© Copyright 2004 Michael J. McManus |
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